1982

This just doesn't work, because you can put the categories in any order depending whom you want to be the punch line. All of these, I'm sorry to say, are real controversies with their own partisans, but there's no effort to arrange them in a way that accentuates their silliness (buying all new socks is way sillier than opening bananas a different way). The comic is left without the kind of escalation it needs to operate as a joke.


1983

This is perhaps the least meaningful way in which Randall could benefit from studying the life of St. Francis.